POST #3 – From Miracles to Emmanuel – Encuentro
“Encuentro” is the term used in Latin American countries to describe the day adoptive families meet their child. It’s a big day with big emotions. Colombian encuentros are different depending on which organization is hosting. Mila’s encuentro was on May 21, 2021 and held at La Casa, a private orphanage that had managed Mila’s care since she was an infant. They had their own expectations of how encuentro should go. They had us bring a special outfit that they dressed Mila in to meet us which was symbolic of her entering our family as one of us. Our family had stood in a courtyard as they brought her to us in a processional sort of way as they sang La Vaca Lola.
Emmanuel’s process had been a very different experience all along. Because he wasn’t with any private organization like La Casa, we dealt directly with ICBF, Colombia’s government. During Mila’s adoption, we hadn’t realized just how much La Casa had helped with communicating information. We had lengthy reports about her medical history and had at least 5 video calls with her before going to Colombia. We had felt much more informed and prepared for Mila than we did for Emmanuel. In fact, we were still very much in the dark about his development until right before we got him.
The day before encuentro, we had a two hour pre-encuentro online meeting with many of the people at ICBF who oversaw his care – psychologist, nutritionist, attorney, etc. At this meeting, we learned about his routine, medical needs, and habits. We heard for the first time that in April of 2026, he had been diagnosed with cerebral palsy. It was a lot of information to absorb the day before meeting him. At the end of the call they began describing their expectations for our meeting day. His encuentro was to be a celebration, so they wanted us to bring cake, decorations, and gifts for Emmanuel.
This last minute party request sent me spiraling into the logistics. We had just landed in Colombia a couple days before, were having issues with our delivery app, and were still not feeling well due to altitude. Add the task of steaming our dress clothes and making sure all the kids were ready on time, and I was already stressed before they said to bring a party.
God has been working on my ability to adapt for a while now, slowly tearing down my ideals of perfection. It’s been a hard lesson as I struggle to trust God when He sends me into things that don’t come neatly packaged with clear instructions and reasonable timeframes. But Scripture says we walk by faith, not by sight. God is trying to teach me to trust Him even when I don’t know the outcome, can’t see every detail, and don’t know what every step looks like along the way.
Oh, what a hard lesson as I’m slowly learning that many of the little things I fret over are insignificant compared to what God is doing. I want to be focused on Him and the details that matter to Him. God’s work is about redeeming people. That’s why He sent Jesus. And that’s why He sent us to Colombia again. His heart is for the vulnerable and His plan is for us to take His love into the brokenness and fill the gaps in Emmanuel’s life. I know this. And yet, too often I lose focus of His bigger picture and drown in the details causing unnecessary stress to myself and others. I hope I soon master what God is trying to teach me. I want to be able to stand in awe and celebrate with joy for all He has done even if we only have a few party balloons and someone’s clothes are still wrinkled.
But even so, ICBF had requested a party, and thankfully, Brandon was born for last minute things like this. We both knew he could go into the store and somehow come out with what all we needed before I would even be able to write my list and figure out what aisle the confetti was on. So, without much deliberation, it was decided that he and a couple of the boys would walk to the grocery store the morning of encuentro to get whatever they could find that would make a party. If anyone could come out of Carulla with a party, it was Brandon. And so he did. We had streamers, balloons, cake, juice, cookies, pastries, and gift bags. While he was gone, I laid out everyone’s clothes. We were ready.
We pushed aside all the jitters and cleared our heads as our driver picked us up. We arrived at 10 o’clock to ICBF’s regional office, went through security, handed over our passports for check-in, and were given printed visitor stickers. We were then led to the encuentro room. It was full of toys, kid tables, and chairs. It had a colorful floor and balloons already on the walls. We quickly began setting out the cake and our own decorations.
Many of the same people from ICBF who we had seen at the pre-encuentro meeting the day before came and sat in a circle as we went through last minute paperwork and information and signed a few forms. It was done. Legally he was now under our care, though, not yet our son. All the ICBF staff and our team left, and we waited with just our family for them to bring Emmanuel.
The jitters couldn’t be squashed. We talked amongst ourselves as we made sure the room was ready. We heard them coming as they walked down the corridor. ICBF staff were waiting outside smiling and watching. The photographer and videographer were jumping around to and fro in the background trying to catch every single angle. I saw a nurse carrying him, and I greeted her as I took Emmanuel in my arms. There were still so many questions and unknowns as I finally held the sleeping toddler with wild jet black curls. He immediately snuggled sleepily into my shoulder, and we hugged him and talked to him as he woke up. The other kids were watching and smiling ready to meet their new brother. We introduced all the kids, but Mila was shyly sitting on a black sofa and wouldn’t come though Brandon was coaxing her. I went to sit down beside Mila, and Emmanuel sat up. All the staff and photographers left to give us some space for our first few moments as a family of seven. We gave Emmanuel gifts of toy cars and ate cake and cookies together. He and Mila sat side by side in the kid chairs. She was smiling big as she watched him play with the cars and take a few bites of the sweets. After about 15-20 minutes, people returned, and we encouraged them to take some of the desserts. They took plates to go, and we thanked them and said goodbye. Then we packed up and began leaving ICBF.
On our way out, people were smiling, clapping, and celebrating. I wondered how some of the bystanders knew what was going on. Maybe they thought we were someone special, for certainly we did look like a sight. A multicultural family with five kids total. Our photographer and videographer were still popping all around flashing and clicking. It’s probably the closest we will ever be to feeling like we were on the red carpet.
But it wasn’t red carpet. In fact, it was hard cement floors and security inside and out. There had been children crying at the entrance when we had first arrived. They had been looking out the big windows in obvious distress. As we were celebrating bringing Emmanuel into our family, had these children just begun their journey as orphans? The need sometimes hits hard.
Scripture is clear of God’s heart for the orphans, yet neither Brandon nor I had grown up with the notion that we would someday adopt. But over the years as we told God we were willing to do whatever He called us to do, He then began to show us what He cares about. Having seen God’s heart in this way, now brings emotion as we remember the empty plans we used to make. When we think back to what we wanted our lives to look like, our family to look like, and the things we wanted to accomplish, it all seems like foolish vanity in light of what God has done. We can so easily idealize comfort and fun experiences and in the pursuit of those things, we lose the purpose of our own lives. It’s only as we give up our lives just as Jesus did and crucify our own will and desires that we can really begin to live out the purpose we were created for. Jesus calls us to deny ourselves because it’s only then that we can see past ourselves to begin caring for what matters to the heart of God.
We’ve learned it’s a long journey. I hope ten years from now, we look back and shake our heads at how frivolous our lives are now. Because that will mean that we keep moving closer to God’s heart and what He cares for. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus and saying one yes after another.
We were scanned by security as we exited the ICBF building. Our driver was waiting outside. We were surprised to see a carseat in the back of the van, for children usually don’t use carseats or seatbelts in Colombia. As I sat Emmanuel inside the seat and began to strap him in, he began crying and fighting to get out. Everyone from our team suggested I just hold him, which is what I did for the remainder of our travel in Colombia. I had done the same with Mila.
By the time we reached the hotel, we were all hungry for real food. We sat down at the hotel restaurant. I got a highchair, but Emmanuel pitched a fit and fought not to sit inside. Not knowing a child you’re responsible for and not knowing his previous experiences makes it hard in the beginning. We decided to let grace abound, and he sat inside my lap to eat. We had been told he fed himself. What a mess he made! We left rice and meat scattered all over the floor of the restaurant, and we left a big tip.
It’s hard to describe all the emotions on encuentro day. There was immense joy, for we had waited for this day so long. There was so much gratitude to see how God fulfilled what he had called us to almost two years before. But there was also stress and exhaustion, as we scrambled to acclimate to a new child in a new country. We left the familiar and came to a place where we struggled to do even the simplest things, everything from speaking the language to getting groceries. And Emmanuel had just left behind everyone and everything he knew. This is one thing that makes international adoptions so hard. It’s two unfamiliar cultures coming together. It’s beautiful but also so very challenging.
That night before bed we gathered as a family and sang “Baby Mine” to Emmanuel. We had sung this song to each of our kids when they were little. There was joy in everyone’s voice as we sang because it had special memories for all of us. And we hoped that soon, it would mean something special to Emmanuel as well. As I put Mila to bed, she signed Emmanuel and said “Baby Mine” and was grinning so big. Her name sign for Emmanuel is the ASL letter “e” in her hand and she rocks it. Back home, night after night, she had told me through sign that she was waiting on Emmanuel to come to our home and sleep. She had been waiting so long for him to join our family.
It’s true that our family had waited long for Emmanuel, but not as long as the world waited for Emmanuel the Savior. Can you imagine how weary people became as they waited for the promise of the Messiah to be fulfilled? The video below is one that our photographer put together of our encuentro day. We chose the song “Emmanuel” to share the message that God is faithful to fulfill his promises even if we tire in the waiting.
And then in the silence
The Word became flesh
Our God dwelt among us
You gave us your best
You offered communion
You gave up your life
You rose up in victory
And healed the divide
You have always been
You will always be
Emmanuel
While we love and adore Emmanuel our son and welcome him with joy into our family, this is only a part of a much bigger picture. The very specific way God called us to Emmanuel is a testament that God is still with us, still speaking, and still invites us into relationship with Him – for without His presence and His leading, Emmanuel would not be part of our family today.
My next post will tell more about Emmanuel and what we’ve learned since having him with us.
